Thursday, December 16, 2010

Kahwin Tak Kahwin

Lama tak update blog. Kali nak cerita nasib saya dengan tempat saya bekerja. Agak memeranjatkan apabila tersiar di dada akhbar mengatakan syarikat tempat ku bekerja akan dimergekan dengan salah sebuah syarikat pembangunan hartanah yang memang terkenal dengan pembangunannya yang rancak lebih-lebih lagi di Penang. Dengarnya arahan dari pihak atasan, alasannya pemegang saham terbesar syarikat berpendapat syarikat tempat kita bekerja incapable to develope one of the erea yang sedang menjadi buruan developers kat Malaysia ni. Tapi banyak-banyak syarikat kenapa pilih syarikat yang akan menelan syarikat yang being dominated by bangsa luar? kenapa tak pilih syarikat yang didominasi bangsa sendiri ? takpelah kalau syarikat bangsa sendiri itu sederhana besar + syarikat tempat aku kerja = satu gergasi yang didominasi oleh bangsa sendiri. Memang agak berbau "kebangsaan" tapi hakikatnya bangsa kita kekurangan syarikat yang gah dimata dunia, tapi bila ada satu kenapa nak dihilangkan atau digadaikan?. memang benar, kita sepatutnya kita kena fikirkan syarikat dan bukan didominasi oleh sesiapa, tapi kita kena kenang juga survival bangsa dan menanam kepercayaan kepada bangsa sendiri.
Kejayaan pembangunan yang dijalankan oleh syarikat tempatku berkerja membuktikan kebolehan bangsa kita membangun kawasan yang orang tak pandang satu masa dulu kepada satu pembangunan yang menjadi icon dan tumpuan seluruh Malaysia bahkan menjadi contoh pembangunan hub bertintegrasi. Tapi dimanakah kepercayaan itu sekarang? kenapa dihilangkan kepercayaan itu? walaupun bukti kejayaan yang diterajui oleh bangsa sendiri terbentang di depan mata?! kenapa?
Kenapa tidak digunakan kebolehan yang ada untuk diberikan peluang untuk tanah pembangunan yang katanya nak diberi kepada anak sendiri. Kenapa mesti biarkan kebolehan anak sendiri, dan sanjung kebolehan orang lain dari anak sendiri? kalau syarikat tempatku bekerja ini mampu mebangunan kawasan hitam kepada lubuk emas kuala lumpur yang baru kenapa tidak diberi peluang itu terus kepada anak sendiri? Takut gagal? kalau itu jawapannya, itu bermaksud bapa malu dengan anak sendiri.Kita rasa kita lebih berkebolehan kerana syarikat tempat kita bekerja mempunyai pengalaman pembangunan hartanah yang dipanggil multi development, ada residensi, office, hotel, shopping kompleks dan hub pengangkutan, tapi kenapa kepercayaan itu tidak diberi kepada syarikat temapat kita bekerja? Ya memang betul, syarikat tempat ku bekerja tidak mempunyai "land" selain adri apa yang tinggal sekarang, maka dengan kekurangan ini dan kelebihan kebolehan pembangunan yang ada, syarikat tempat kita bekerja perlu diberi peluang untuk membangun hartanah yang sedang menjadi tumpuan semua "developer" di Malaysia?.
Ingatlah , jangan kita jadi yang dikejar tak dapat yang dikendong keciciran.

Renung-renungkanlah

Monday, December 6, 2010

Selamat Tahun Baru / Maal Hijrah

It's been a loooong time I did not write on my blog. Actually it is not that I do not want to write but trying to be little bit sensitive to the surroundings. As sometimes what we wrote might indirectly hurts, exploited or even misunderstood by the readers. In conjunction with Maal Hijrah, I will try to be more meticulous and careful on what I do, write, talk or act.
Maal Hijrah is a new year for all Muslims. We should look back to review and keep all the lessons that we have learn t throughout the years and get ourselves prepared for the future to come. My new year resolution is to be more meticulous, friendly, active and open to new knowledge. Hope I can be a near to perfect person to everybody that I know, I love, and and have expectation on me. Aminnn....

Thursday, November 11, 2010

My Little Baby Now Turn to 5

My little baby now turn to 5. I feel like only yesterday she was born and today she is 5. How fast is the time goes by leaving us behind. How our future looks like? How will it be in another 5 years from now?She will be taller than mummy is for sure. I missed her maggi curls of her hair. The cheeky face when she asked for her "susu". I missed her first word of "chak apu".
Now her routine is to go to school everyday and daycare for the rest of her day. Back from daycare, take out her uniform and put it in washing machine. Before sleep she will recite "al-fatihah" and doa penerang hati. It's funny when heard her recite doa penerang hati every nite before sleep as that's doa she remember.. Anyway at least it's good for her , hopefully Allah makbulkan doanya dan jadilah dia budak yang cerdik.
I always pray that she will be anak yang soleh. Happy Birthday Sayang, mummy and daddy love you so much. Wish you will become " Anak yang Soleh", clever and success when you grow older and bigger.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Hari Raya 2010

This Raya we went back to Alor Star, my daughter was more appreciate when we took her to Istana Anak Bukit to beraya with Sultan Kedah. She was excited to meet the King and Queen of Kedah. Sayang tak ada gambar dia tengah bersalam dengan the King and the Queen of Kedah coz all of us do beratur waiting for our turn when our turn came tak sempat nak snap photo.

This raya my hubby has to go outstation to Ho Chi Minh on the 5th day of Raya and we had to make our trip to Alor Star a lot more shorten than previous years. So just two of us went back beraya di banting . The most fun this raya, my daughter has a pet in banting . This raya our family day was celebrated early a week than previous year. Unfortunately not many turn up making the crowds smaller but making us much closer. The most interesting was when some of my cousin making special turn up after few rayas never turn up. But some purposely dissapear for some reason.Nevertheless, this year raya gathering was meriah.

Sunday, August 8, 2010

What are things that can make you happy?

1. Bila apa yang didoakan termakbul.
Dulu cita-cita saya bila dah habis belajar dan bekerja ialah untuk membantu my parents. Salah satu cita-cita itu ialah membelikan sebuah kereta untuk abah kerana semasa belajar abah beri saya guna keretanya untuk pergi belajar. alhamdulillah, bila sang kancil saya telah terlansai hutangnya maka saya berikan kancil itu kepada abah sebagai balasan.

2. Untuk membeli sebuah rumah dengan hasil usaha sendiri.
Dulu saya bercita-cita untuk membeli sebuah rumah agar dapat saya berkongsi hasil usaha saya itu bersama abah dan emak yang telah membesarkan dan memberi perlindungan yang secukupnya kepada saya. Alhamdulillah tercapai cita-cita itu walaupun tidak dapat berkongsi untuk jangkamasa yang panjang namun semalam mereka bermalam dirumah tersebut telah memberikan kepuasan pada saya. Yang paling membanggakan setiap sudut rumah tersebut merupakan hasil usaha saya sendiri tanpa meminta sesenpun daripada sesiapa.

3. Dapat membantu adik-adik.
alhamdulillah dengan adanya rezeki yang Tuhan beri dapat saya berkongsi rezeki yang diberi dengan adik beradik yang masih memerlukan. Tidak banyak, walau sedikit harapnya dapat membantu mereka ketika mereka berjuang mencari ilmu. Diharap mereka dapat menghargai segala usaha dan budi ibu dan bapa.

4. Sekiranya saya berumahtangga, dapat memberikan yang terbaik
adalh menjadi impian saya apabila berumahtangga saya ingin menjadi yang terbaik untuk suami dan anak saya. Sebaik mungkin saya mahu membantu suami tercinta dan memberi yang terbaik kepada anak kesayanganku. Alhamdulillah, mungkin tidak yang terbaik kepada mereka tetapi yang terbaik dapat saya berikan kepada suami dan anakku yang tersayang. Seperti pesan emak, beri yang terbaik untuk mereka. Pesan abah pula, biar bertapa buruk atau kurangnya suami atau anak kita, mereka tetap suami dan anak kita dan seharusnya yang terbaik untuk mereka. Saya tetap bahagia

Friday, June 11, 2010

Ulangtahun ku Yang ke-35

9 June genap umur saya 35 tahun. 35 tahun perjalanan hidup mengajar saya tentang kehidupan namun perjalanan masih panjang dan banyak yang perlu dipelajari. Pastinya saya masih kurang ilmu keibuan and familyhood.

Wondering what I had contribute to my family. had I done the best for them?. I hope I did, when they really need my help. In their good time when I can't joint them, hope it can be excused but in their bad times when they need me, I hope I will never miss to be there giving my hand to help them. Did my contribution can be appreciated by them ? not too sure as the level of acceptance and satisfaction can only be judged by those who received it not by me who is giving it. What they said about what I had given to them is not a matter. What they say about me is not a matter. The most important thing that I will do the best for them. I got cranky or upset and telling them what it should be, it just my words that want the best for my siblings. I don't care means I don't love. The noise that I made is because I love them.

I just want that all my siblings are known for their high level of responsibility, spirit and brain. Because all these will make my parents proud of what they have. I acknowledged my weaknesses and others too but we must try the best to overcome it. We must always go forward for improvement.

Wondering also, had i become a good mother and wife to my daughter and husband?. I don't but hope they will give me a room to improve. I need a guidance from the experienced so that I will become the dream mother by all kids and husband.

Ya Allah, beri aku petunjuk serta kebaikan dan lindungi ibu, ayah, suami, anak dan adik-adik ku dari segala kekurangan dan keburukan. Berikan kami kemudahan, kesenangan dalam menjalani kehidupan ini. Murahkan rezeki kami dan lorongkanlah kami ke jalan kebenaran dan kebaikan. Bukakanlah hatiku, suamiku serta anakku untuk mendekatiMu. Sesungguhnya hanyaEngkaulah tempat Kami memohon dan sesungguhNya Engkau maha memakbulkan doa hambaMu. Aminnn...

Itulah doa harian ku selepas sembahyang. Semoga doaku dimakbulkan.

Saturday, June 5, 2010

Hidup Kita Hanya Pinjaman

Saya baru pulang menziarahi sepupu suami saya yang sedang dalam keadaan kritikal di serang sakit jantung. Pada umurnya di awal 40 an, dia telah mendapat serangan jantung. Kesian dan sedih melihat nasib anak-anak dan isterinya. Inilah yang dikatakan kehidupan kita di dunia ini hanya pinjaman. Bila-bila masa sahaja Tuhan menguji, mengambil hakNya. Kita ini sebenarnya hanya meminjam darinya.
Semoga Tuhan memberi perlindungan kepadanya dan keluarganya.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Confuse

Kekadang tak faham dengan senario kerja sekarang. Paling tak faham bila dikatakan tak beri updates sedangkan baru last week hantar. Adakah tidak aware atau sengaja nak create unawareness sebab nak tunjuk orang bawah tak buat kerja. Paling tak faham tugas siapakah yang patut berhubung dengan tuan-tuan besar untuk mendapat penjelasan sebenar sesuatu projek?. Kalau orang atas tak boleh nak communicate dengan orang yang lebih atas, apakan lagi orang bawah nak bercakap dengan orang yang lebih atas dari orang atas. tak override ke namanya tu?. Adakah sistem kerja kita dari bawah ke atas atau dari atas ke bawah?. adakah orang bawah pergi keluar mencari business contact dan balik office suruh bos siapkan prposal paper ATAU bos yang keluar cari business contact dan balik suruh staff bawah iaitu executive ( person who supposed to execute certain task given by the superior) yang buat propsal paper?. Who should get better pay? the person who bring business in or the person who do execution work?How to be in the loop of business circle? Rasanya kena proactive ..contoh bila terdengar cerita... terus tanya dengan source...so you will get the latest updates...so tak yah susah-susah nak buat kerja suruh orang bawah pi tanya orang yang atas, atas....heran ya kenapa tuan-tuan atas tak buat kerja-kerja yang berulang?.. saya rasa sebabnya they always want to know the uppdates from the source...they always want to be the one who knows everything rather than waiting others to feed information to them... Jangan salahkan orang lain bila orang atas tegur that you are not aware of certain project sebab tuan besar lain yang bawak business masuk dalam company...frankly... saya tidak mempunyai kebolehan seperti orang-orang atas yang mempunyai business contact dan komunikasi yang bagus dan saya juga tidak layak untuk jawatan besar seperti membawa business ke dalam syarikat tapi saya hanya mampu memberi full commitment terhadap execution work.

Saturday, May 8, 2010

My littlegirl

It has been 4 months Shakira with us. It was a great experience seeing my daughter grown up. While updating my blog surprisingly she hummed Hafiz's song which I first time heard. She is now can sing Anuar Zain's song, I'm the lucky one when the cd turning on. She can also sing Kantoi even though she might not understand the meaning.
I feel so great when the teacher says she was a great girl at school in socializing, she's been so considerate with other friends and know how to make friends. I believed she learns a lot from the environment surroundings her.
Last sunday I brought her to a shelter home for orphans in Kanchong Darat. In that shelter home lives 16 orphans aged from 5 years oled to 10 years old. When she was there she was observing them reading books and playing together but without parents with them. She suddenly told me that she wants to go to school. Terharu sangat masa tu.
And then came Monday...macam biasa I sent her to school, surprisingly she did not cry....I believed the visit to the shelter home has given her some new lesson and experience. I will try to bring her to the place where she can learn from experience more frequent.
Today when I open her bag to check her homework, I found a purple teddy bear drawing says "I love you mummy & daddy so much, Happy parent's day"... I love you too Shakira.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

The Memorable Week




It has been quite sometimes I did not update my blog. 15 April 2010, ermm.. was a date that I will never forget. How could I forget the date I met my favorite singer, Anuar Zain. Thanks to friends who gave me an opportunity to watch his grand performance and met him personally. He is a polish and charming person. His warm personality will melt every heart just how he touches every heart when he sings. He really got the charisma as a professional singer.
I adore him since I was in a primary school when he started his boom album of Kain Pelekat with Elina. I got the scrap book which my mom has thrown away when she cleaned up house. It was like a dream come true when I met him personally as it was my dream when I was in a primary school.
Luckily I got a very understanding and sporting husband who allows me to go for any of his events. He let me went to Anuar's concert at IB which was the best concert I ever attended besides Celine Dion. It was awesome. I wish Anuar will have another concert at IB or Philharmonic. Pak Zain must be proud of him. He must be inherited the warm personilty from Pak Zain. Congrats to pak Zain. Congrates to Anuar who never disappoint his fans' expectation. He performs like an international singer.

Saturday, March 6, 2010

2010 - New series of Life Begins

January 2010 was the begining of a new stage of my life. My little daughter now stay with us for the first time after 4 years stayed with my parents. It was a sad moment when I heard that my mom has actually plan for her kindergarten, but I hope they can accept the fact Shakira has to stay with us.
It was a challenge for us when we have to change our priority in life and work. Those days, work comes first but now Shakira comes first. 6.00am I have to wake up just to get prepare my daughter's meal to school. My daughter is a little bit fussy and choosy with the food she ate. She did not simply eat what people serve, she will only choose what she wants to eat. So I got to prepare her food before send her to school.
The other challenge is to please her to go to the class and the day care. Pitty her has to be away from home the whole day, not like her stay with Nenek and Atuk where she was the circle of attention at home. Now 6.00p.m sharp I will leave office regardless I got work or not coz I got to be at my daughter's daycare before 7.00p.m. Anyway, I have to pay extra for the extra hour late pick up. The first three weeks at the day care she refuse to sleep in her bed during nap time, and refuse to go the day care after class. she always cried when I came to pick her up as she was the last at the day care.
Now, crying before she enter her class is just a habit, but progressively adapt to the schooling environment . Hence, she adapt very well at the day care. She is now sleeping in her own bed at the day care and laugh and smiles welcoming me during the pick up time in the evening.
I believe the time will come where she will understand the cycle of life better and the demand of changes in life. Ya Allah guide her to pass through her life at the best of hers and protect her from everything that is not good and healthy for her.

Friday, February 5, 2010

Pemberian Yang Sangat Berharga

Kehidupan di dunia adalah pemberian Tuhan yang paling berharga kerana kita diberi peluang menikmati pemberianNya.

Kita sebagai umat manusia wajib mensyukuri pemberianNya dan jangan sekali menyesali pemberianNya. Ada sesetengah orang merasakan kehidupan mereka serba kekurangan sedangkan mereka tidak menyedari akan kelebihan yang diberi, mereka sering melihat kepada kekurangan dan tidak pada kelebihan yang ada. Pada mereka yang dah senang, masih lagi tidak mensyukuri apa yang diberi malah menegeluh akan keadaan yang sedia ada.

Yang pasti kehidupan ini hanyalah pinjaman, tiba masanya nanti kita akan pulang ke pangkuanNya juga.

Monday, February 1, 2010

The End of 1st Month of 2010

Well, it has been a month past through, and Feb is reaching the end of it's first week. A lot of sweet and sour things had happened in the past one month of 2010. I was loaded with financial obligations, bought my sister McBook, pay my car insurance and road tax, car repayment and much more but not as much as my husband is. At the end of Jan, I was admitted in a hospital for a lap & dye and endoscopy procedure that really hit me badly internally. I pray for Allah to give me the strongest ability to stand and face the decision and gift that He had for me. I believe whatever Allah gave me is the best for me. I am so lucky that I have my family behind me, my husband, eventhough seems not really understand how I feel and the pain I had but he is supportive. Spend a long hour journey on roads visisting me everyday after work at my Banting house. I have to stay in Banting that's the only place where I could receive a King's treatment by my parents. Everything they did for me from meal to clothes, and I couldn't get all that if I'm stay alone at home in Damansara. Thank you very much as big a the world size, as wide the ocean is to my parents and my sisters who being so understanding and supportive with my conditions and situations. My little daughter eventhough will never understand what I am facing, but she tried ttand that I am sick, hold my hand when I'm going to the toilet, get me things when I need it , but I can't give her what she wants, a babby brother. Sorry my dear . That was a moment ,I can't let my tears drops. Anyway, They are the best I have in my life... I love you all, whithout you I can't be as strong as I am now.

I just a part of not so sweet things happened to me, but I have lot of sweet things happened to me. Shakira is now with us, my husband got promotion but remain as he is and never change, I got my first most expensive watch that I dreamt of and many other sweet things. I think it's the balanced of the sour that I had. That's how fair is Allah's gifts to me. Alhamdulillah.

Friday, January 22, 2010

3 weeks a full time mother

It has been 3 weeks I become a full time mother. All this while I only see my daughter over the weekend. It was a challenging experience that really challenged me mentally and physically. However, it was fun to see my daughter's development at school, at home, socially and religiously. I am proud my daughter when I can hear she sings, listen to her reciting "doa makan", talking about school at home.

having her at home with me is another fun story to tell. Depends on her mood she can easily offering helps to do housework such as keep all dirty clothes into the laundry basket, throw rubbish into a dustbin, reminding everybody about the mess that should be tidy up (well, she actually did the mess but she will complaint like other people did) and she will do.

Staying with grandparents for such a long period has given an emotion effects to her actually after been separated for three weeks. She keep telling that she doesn't want to go to school because she said she wants to see nenek and damia. That was her reason that she gave me when I'm sending her to school. Nenek and atuk from afar look normal but deep in their heart they missed my daughter so much, same to my daughter. We try to bring her to see my grandparents once in a two weeks.

I hope the life become easier as she grows up.